mom – Momginerd

Since I have been in “list mode” lately, I decided to add just one more (for today…shut it, I like lists).

Here is a list of my favorite gadgets that are not games/phones/etc, or battery operated and no this isn’t a post about B.O.B.s!…let’s step UP to the gutter folks!

1. Rice Cooker. We LOVE rice. Brown Rice, Basmati Rice, Jasmine Rice, Spanish Rice…they all are in regular rotation in our menus. In the past, I found making rice on the stove top to be hit or miss. Sometimes the rice would come out okay, but most of the time it was either too mushy or too dry. I purchased a Rice Cooker a few years back and now we have PERFECT rice every single time. You can do other things with the rice cooker, like steam veggies and the like, but I use mine for cooking rice…duh.

2. Pressure Cooker. I grew up with the sound of the pressure cooker hissing in my mom and mamaw’s kitchens. Older versions have this counter-weight you put on the pressure valve, and when the pot reaches pressure the valve swings back and forth making a sound similar to the sound of cicadas in the Summer…anyway, I have a newer version and it saves so much time cooking. You can cook a pot of green beans in literally 5 minutes! You can make a whole pot roast in less than 30! It is a working and/or just busy parent’s savior. One of the added benefits of the pressure cooker is you use very little water when cooking veggies/meats so that means many of the good flavors and vitamins are locked in via the steam pressure. Roasts come out fork tender…I kid you not! It does take some getting used to, because I am a pot-peeker. I like to open the lid, sample, and peek at what is cooking. You have to learn to TRUST the pressure cooker, there is no peeking or opening the lid to check it out.

3. Trampoline. YES I know how unsafe they are…yadda, yadda, yadda. I also know that my kids saved up their money for a whole YEAR and paid for 75% of the trampoline. It is used within sight of an adult and with rules. We also researched (you are shocked I know) and found the “safest” one we could buy. It is not the $150 special, trust me. Anyway, my kids LOVE the trampoline. They have had it for about a year now and have spent countless HOURS jumping away. They get lots of good cardio, and mommy gets to drink her wine and watch them…just kidding…sometimes I don’t watch them.

4. DVR. I adore my DVR. There are some shows (Have you checked out Duck Dynasty or An Idiot Abroad?…hilarious), that I really enjoy watching. I am also very busy running mom’s taxi service, so I don’t really have a lot of time to watch said TV. So, I rely on my DVR. It is also awesome for recording kid appropriate shows, although mine is usually so full of episodes of Game of Thrones, True Blood and other things there isn’t room for kid shows. Hottie Husband and I will usually pick a Sunday every few weeks and call Pajama Day. We all keep our jammies on all day, eat breakfast food and get caught up on our shows. I call Pajama Day a day in HEAVEN! The bestest feature of all on the DVR is you can fast forward through commercials, so you can watch an hour show in about 42 minutes!

5. Whirly Pop. This is a stove top popcorn popper with a paddle in it that you spin to keep the popcorn from burning. I can’t stand microwave popcorn, and this makes the most awesomist popcorn. This thing should be plated in gold and given an award. I kid you not! I got mine from an Amish store many years ago, but I now see they are readily available from Amazon.com and other places. We have a local popcorn distributor and if we are feeling really gourmet, we will go there and buy different types of popcorn (did you know they have BLUE popcorn, and popcorn with no hulls?).

6. Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer. I cook a lot. I looked through the calendar and in the last 60 days we have gone out or had take out only 3 times. Cooking is almost like therapy for me. Unfortunately, with working full time and running Mom’s Taxi Service as a second job, I do not have as much time in the kitchen as I’d like. So, I love my stand mixer because it does a lot of the work for me. I have the meat grinding, pasta making, and slicing attachments. I can get an indentured servant (kid) to do the grinding/slicing/kneading while I am doing something else towards the meal preparation. When we remodeled our Kitchen (see remodel from Hell parts 1, 2, 3), I took the measurements of my mixer with me when working with the designer. I had to be SURE that my mixer would fit exactly where I wanted it on my counter top.

7. Keurig. OMG, the only thing that keeps me going is coffee. The Keurig makes the BEST coffee I have ever had. It even has a timer on it, so the water is ready to brew my first cup of awesomeness as soon as I come down the stairs in the mornings. I do not even miss what used to be my almost daily trip through the Starbucks or Big B coffee stands anymore. As a bonus, I have more money to spend on k-cups and get to work 15 minutes earlier every day!

Until next time,
Nic

P.S. Did you know there is a Momginerd FaceBook page? Also, some of my best sarcasm can be found on my Pinterest!

M.O.M. (Mean Ol’ Mom) Yes that is me, and I am damn proud of the title. Perhaps I am old school, but I believe that when I brought children into the world, I took on the job of insuring that they be: Respectful, Kind, Responsible, Independent, Inquisitive, Behaved, Educated, Kind, and Domesticated.

To accomplish these goals, I am raising my kids with a proverbial iron fist. I do not believe they were put on this Earth to be worshiped. The fact that they were born of my body does not make them perfect, nor does it make me believe that everyone in the fracking (bonus points to those fellow geeks who get this reference) world must worship them. When in public, I expect them to act like they have been there before…if they don’t then we will leave and go home where the wrath of M.O.M will be unleashed upon them and their precious privileges.

I also believe that those privileges need to be EARNED. I work hard to EARN the privilege of my paycheck and I firmly assert that my kids need to earn the privilege of their computer time, play dates, video games, etc. There are expectations that are set for them, and if they do not meet them, they lose out on their privileges.

For example: Bubbie has had a lot of issues with his ADHD and behavior in the classroom. He has learned that he can blame such behavior on said ADHD. Little does he know, he is not fooling anyone but himself. If he can sit and play Plants -vs- Zombies for 2 hours in front of the computer without invading someone else’s personal space, he can sit for a 20 minute math lesson in class. Repeatedly, I was called by the teacher to address this issue regarding Bubbie. We did due diligence and came up with a fair contract both at home and with the school to assist him. Guess what? The contract worked GREAT, until that smart bugger figured out that once he has XX days of success, he wasn’t going to get a damn prize for DOING WHAT HE IS SUPPOSED TO DO! The very next day, and for 3 consecutive days thereafter, his behavior was that of a howler monkey who had his banana stolen and was shot up with adrenalin.

Give me my fraking banana or I will go ape $hit!

Bubbie and I had a “discussion” with the promise made that if he did not meet his minimum goal the following day, he would not attend a field trip with his class that week. Obviously Bubbie is a bit stubborn and thinks that M.O.M. is a softie….He was SO wrong. He sat home with the Nanny while all his classmates went on a fantabulous field trip. Let me just say, Bubbie never failed to meet his “minimum expectation” again for that behavior.

Many of my family/friends told me how unfair I was being to my poor precious male child. Bah…I responded that I have earned the title of M.O.M. the hard way, by saying what I mean and meaning what I say and having the fortitude and courage to follow up with actions. Trust me, this is not the easy way to parent. Sometimes I think that “permissive” parents feel that they have made the choice that is the most work. I disagree 100%. It is so easy to let your kids treat you and others with disrespect, to run amok everywhere, to be rude and demanding, and to basically become drains on society. It is MUCH harder to set rules and consistently enforce them. It takes a lot of training of one’s offspring for them to realize that when they get “the look” or hear “the voice” (which is actually the opposite of yelling, it consists of clenching your jaw and hissing at them to “stop it right now”) to know that M.O.M. means business and they better straighten up right now. If not, you may end up like this:

Help us! We didn’t respond to “the look” or “the voice”!!!

Teaching good manners are a huge goal of effective parenting to me. It isn’t because “manners” are that important to perse, but more because the act of teaching manners requires patience and consistency and the art of learning manners teaches respect and the ability to react consistently. My kids rarely forget to say thank you, excuse me, or chew with their mouths open. I firmly believe that by consistently pushing them to practice good manners, it makes it easier for them to follow all rues. Manners is something that crosses all social situations both at home and in public so I think that they become more accustomed to life’s other rules and expectations.

I love (read hate) going out to eat when there are other families there and the kids are going bat ass crazy the whole time. Really?!? I want those parents to know: I do not like your kids, I do not think their behaviour is cute or funny or charming, and I think you are a failure of a parent if you can’t teach your kids that disturbing others who are also paying for their meals is rude. When you give the other diners who are staring at you the raised shoulder smirk that means “Kids! What are you going to do?” You can be sure that we all have some friendly advice for you that involves discipline and basic consistent teaching of manners!
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I get so frustrated and sick and tired of listening to all the complaining of other parents saying “I can’t understand why my kid is such a brat and so disrespectful.” Ummmm….maybe because these parents are so afraid of “hurting their feelings” that they don’t discipline them????? People can blame television, video games, etc, but at the end of the day we have to realize that if we do not have high expectations in the home, why should kids feel they have to exceed at anything? And yes, I have torn to pieces homework assignments that were done too quickly and were too messy to read. I have had kids miss fun activities because they didn’t clean their room well enough, do things “because I said so,” and many other M.O.M. things that “hurt their feelings”. I tell them to build a bridge and get over it. Life is full of disappointments, but unless you learn to deal with both success AND failure, you will never be anything.

NO, I am not saying my parenting is perfect nor are my kids perfect. But I will say that invariably their teachers/other parents comment on how self sufficient they are, how respectful they are, and how they seem mature when compared to their peers. NO, I wouldn’t write a book about it or expect every parent to parent as I do. However, I do think this country is in a world of hurt in the future if the next generation doesn’t learn that mommy isn’t going to be there to schedule their every activity, tell them that last place is always okay and reward them for just showing up and taking up space. You can have the world’s best self esteem, but if you can’t hold a job, be independent, follow rules, get along with others, or make your own decisions, where in life will you end up?

Rant over!

Until next time,
Nic

Tag: mom

Household items I would rather sell my children for than live without (not really, but maybe somedays)

M.O.M. = Mean Ol’ Mom